Two (frosty) zero days in a row.

Maybe sometimes in this human body and with a human mind, I will just have a sucky day.  or days. Can I list the “reasons?”  sure.  is that beneficial?  nah. It’s not beneficial because it keeps my attention on the idea that there are reasons I’m not happy other than the simple decision to be happy — no — matter — what.

What is that is so seductive to the ego-identity about a victim’s disposition?  Why is it so easy to go there?  How did I get the belief that happiness is ephemeral, fleeting, but sadness is consistent?

What am I getting out of self-pity?  It’s certainly not self-awareness, although I think I just realized:  that’s it.  That’s the trickster.